Things that I don’t understand – IV

      1. Fluid mechanics. Office politics. And heart
      2. Black holes. Black-heads. What existed before big bang. And heart.
      3. X-men movie timeline, Donnie Darko and why I suck at receiving compliments.
      4. Complex philosophical theories. The Tree of Life movie. And my procrastinating habits.

I glance at my phone again. Its screen is plain black with light reflecting through its cracked edges and it is idiotly smiling back at me as if it doesn’t understand my irritation at all. Why aren’t you blinking with a notification? A telephone under a chat circle or an f under a square? Why aren’t you quenching my curiosity? But I thought you wanted me to be silent and not disturb you. And now when I am doing exactly that, you have a problem? Again?

I and my smartphone are in an abusive relationship. My palms have huge holes and they are pretty fond of providing free fall experiences to my phone.

Even with its bruised and malfunctioning screen, my wounded and weak phone can still torture me effortlessly. In fact more now.

If you hate me so much, why don’t you get rid of me? I don’t mind being sold. You can go back to using landlines. I know you terribly miss them.

I don’t know how my phone learnt sarcasm but certainly it’s more fluent in it than I can ever be. “I should do that. I should sell you.” I retort.

I am proud of your decision. I am sure you won’t find it hard to let go of all the applications you are fond of using.

All the applications? Facebook? Twitter? Maps? Gmails? Uber? Chrome? Camera?

Yes, you can ‘clearly’ live easily without them of course.

Whatever. What matters right now is not this stupid argument but the question,”Why aren’t you blinking yet?”

Blinking with what. You need to be specific. You meant the drop-but-actually-a- fire thing?

Shut up. I wasn’t asking for that notification.

No? So I suppose you are asking for notifications of the news app you never bother to use?

Okay, the telephone under the circle thing. Now you know, go blink.

No. I won’t.

Exasperated I return to my book. Sure, actually it’s good I am away from all those distractions. I can concentrate. Two lines into the paragraph, some idiot in my head speaks,”But why hasn’t he messaged you yet? Is he ignoring you?”

“Does it matter?” I ask back.

Silence again. Fifth line into the paragraph, the idiot speaks again, “But why hasn’t he messaged you yet? Are you not interesting enough?”

“Does it matter?”

The question works again. I tell my brain, rather I request my brain for his kind attention on the words that I am trying to read. It obeys. For three minutes. Then I go on a date, with the same guy who did text me back in this dreamworld. He had apologized. He said he was too busy with work. But he also said he would make up for it by a dinner in a good Sushi restaurant. Ah! Sushi. How did he even know I love Sushi? Now we are in this fancy restaurant, eating the most delicious Sushi ever made on the face of the Earth. And I have finally learnt how to use chopsticks. There’s a huge platter of Sushi in front of me. There are so many varieties and each one is equally delicious. But if you ask which one’s my favorite–

My phone blinks with the telephone thing for real. I snap out of my date-but-increasingly-transforming-into-food daydreams. Has he finally texted? You are blinking, my love. You are finally blinking.

Hold your horses, young lady. How can you be so sure that I am blinking with his text.

Ah no. Don’t say it. Don’t imply it. Don’t jinx it. No. It has already been jinxed, hasn’t it? Yeah, it’s not from him. It’s a message on the school group – another useless GIF.

You do know I can’t make him text, right? Stop being stupid.

You are stupider.

Oh really? Let’s check your search history on Google, shall we?

How does my own phone gets to speak with me like that? You are supposed to be my servant.

And you are supposed to be worthy of being served to. I will tell you – Here’s what is going to happen now. You are going to continue gawking at me for like 12 straight hours. Then you shall finally give up only till you send him a drunk text like an hour later. He is going to reply with a conversation-ender. Suddenly, your ego that you had carelessly sold in your drunkenness will come running back to you. Horrified, you won’t reply. You will archive/delete the chat and resolve you are never going to text him again. That resolution will end in exactly two hours and twenty seven minutes. Then you are going to start obsessing again. Be better than this obsession cycle, your highness. Be better.

Okay duck him. Let’s scroll through our Facebook Newsfeed again.

You did that like 27.25 seconds ago but I am happy to comply.

I need to read but a quick glance through twitter?

Of course.

Facebook again?

Of course.


Of course.


Of course.

Two hours later, I finally decide to turn off my phone and return to my book. The words don’t make sense initially but I continue to read anyway. Somewhere, along some paragraphs, I finally immerse in the text. The black screen of my phone still keeps radiating temptation in the background. My smartphone pretends it is not doing that on purpose. Evil bastard, I resolve not to fall into his trap again. Twenty two minutes later, I am watching some random shit on YouTube. How and why exactly is what I don’t understand.


An Ode to the Deadlines

So long I had postponed
Owing to the mispositions of stars
Or maybe just the urgency to complete utterly unnecessary tasks
A day after another after another after another
Until you came finally,
As you had, once upon a forgotten time, forewarned
So, here’s to the panic
to the parade of chaos that you have brought along
to the adrenaline rush
to the songs of forbidden words
to the regret of wasted yesterdays
No, no prayer is to be sung to the goddess of procrastination today,
No! Don’t you dare, you treacherous mind…
Today isn’t a good day
Today is the DEADLINE!
The day where the work of 10 months is compressed in 72 hours
So, here’s to the supernatural productivity
To the last minute shortcuts
To the funny gods
To the funnier prayers
To the fake promises
To a distant dream of equal work division over time
Commutimism as they call it
And finally to completion of the since long incompleted
Scribbled, battered, stitched along the odd edges
Ugly, with gruesome scars of laziness
But who cares about the beauty though?
At least the end is here.
We will start the next project tomorrow.
Or maybe the tomorrow after tomorrow
Or the tomorrow after that
But for now, we are done.
Ready to repeat our mistake all over again
With a false and yet believable hope let’s completely forget the stress and pain,
Of course, we are going to be alright,
As long as we celebrate the ending and not the perfection
My lazy ‘this-would-do-just-fine’ success brought by an odd hero of mine,
What would I do without you my beloved deadline?



The art of procrastination-II

So, you are probably reading this as an excuse to not to do what you are really supposed to do. But you made a good decision. Because today we are going to learn how to put this habit to our advantage.

In my last article I mainly talked about how procrastination is not the nuclear bomb you think it to be but it’s merely a bomb you use during Diwali. It might have a life changing effect but that effect may not be adverse. That effect could be marvelous!

Before we move on any further I am about to go into my research.



Well, I know it’s hard to believe but I did a little research on procrastination while I was procrastinating.

(Putting my habit to my advantage like I said.)

I was trying to find the answer of why I procrastinate. And I came across many general reasons for why people procrastinate but the answer to why I procrastinate goes something like this-

Three reasons mainly-

  • I am a perfectionist!

How so?

I want things to be so perfect, so good from the very beginning that I am not able to begin at all.

Say you want to read a book..

Now you want perfect conditions.

You want a big window..

You want mountains and waterfalls that you could stare at from your big window.

You want a fluffy and heavenly soft pillow to support your spine as you gaze the big mountains and waterfalls from your big beautiful window.

You want to sip on a delicious hot coffee as you read the book sitting with heavenly soft pillow and staring at the big mountains and the waterfalls from your big beautiful window.

Result: You never read,

I admit that I am a hopeless perfectionist.( But I am working on it )

  • Lack of self confidence.

The thing that I am supposed to do, I am not going to be able to do anyway. So why bother doing.

Psychology is simple.

But the question is -why am I never confident?

Because I am in vicious cycle.

At first I try doing something.

I fail. I am not up to the mark.

I am like- Okay! I will try better next time.

I try to try but being a procrastinator I am, my trying to make an effort prove worthless.

And I fail again.

I want to be good. I want to try harder. But now I believe that it’s of no use.

I procrastinate. I fail. So, I am less confident. So, I procrastinate. So, I fail. So, I am lesser confident. Therefore, I procrastinate. And then I fail. And hence I am least confident. So, I procrastinate. Then, I fail. Now, I am less than least confident.

See? Cycle never ends.


  • Lack of passion.

I don’t like doing what I am supposed to do. So, I don’t do it.

Why am I not passionate?

Because I am confused. I am trying to do what I am supposed to do. Clearly, I don’t do it because I don’t want to do it. But I still want myself to want to do it because I don’t know what else to do.

The sentence is complex but psychology is simple.

I am not passionate about electrical engineering. So, I never touch the book.

I love reading novels. I do touch them. A lot.


I am not confident. I am not passionate. Where the hell is my life going?

Towards procrastination.


Procrastination; befriending the naïve devil.


I know I won’t be able to read power system tonight because I just can’t do it. I am likely to procrastinate and I can’t stop it.

SO, what should I do?

I could watch a movie. I could talk with walls. I could speculate jumping out of the window.

But no, I decide to write.

I didn’t want to write. But somehow I bring myself to do it. Yeah… I waste some time along with it. But I come down to writing. I make myself come down to writing.

I have found a way to be more productive while I am procrastinating. I have to prepare for my exams, for job interviews for god knows what not. I am not doing any of those but I am procrastinating while I am writing on procrastination like an idiot.

This is the art of procrastination.

Find out your real passion. Find your hobby about which you are so passionate, so passionate, so so passionate that even you yourself can’t bring yourself to not to do it.

You like reading books. No.

Do you LOVE reading books?

Then, read books! Read websites. Build economy. World needs a lot of readers.

The more the better.

You like watching movies. Good. Watch.

Watch in different languages. Watch documentaries. Watch all types of movies. Hold a record. You will have more knowledge in world than anyone else. (No, book readers will probably beat you.)

You like painting. Go ahead do it.

DO what you want to do. Don’t misuse your time “trying to do what you are supposed to do” and then end up doing nothing. You are trying to study but you end up fantasizing about you and Brad Pitt alone doing guchi goo on a secluded island. That’s a marvelous dream but it’s an ultimate misuse of time. Waste your time instead. Do what you are not supposed to. Openly. That’s the art of procrastination.

Mastering your other skills while you are trying to master one.

That’s the art of procrastination.

So, if you are procrastinator, no not just a procrastinator, a good *structured procrastinator do you know how much gifted you are?

You get to master so many skills say, *secondary skills at the same time! Secondary or not.. Skills are always important.

(Readers! The asterisk thingy simply mean that the terms are better explained in the glossary below.

I have included a glossary in my post! I am being lame but I just gotta do it- self five!)

self five(pointno4)

So, don’t drown yourself in depression.

Stop it. You are sad? You are miserable? Shut up. That’s bullshit and you know it.

Don’t promise yourself that you won’t procrastinate anymore. Because again that’s bullshit and you know it. It’s your initial phase of procrastination.

What you can instead do is to procrastinate.

But procrastinate better.

And that’s the art of procrastination.

Signing off with hope to improve my life,



P.S. Okay, this is sorta out of the world thingy-

Like what you read? You have got curious? Google this man; John Perry. He is my hero. ❤ And that’s the guy I stole the name of this post from.



  • Structured procrastination- I think John Perry can explain you better.
  • Secondary skills- the skills that you never thought you could build and though you were passionate about them but you never gave a shit before)






The art of procrastination

There are many things that exist in my priority lists almost every day. Completing assignments, reading ‘word power made easy’, going through the notes of power system analysis and reading the chapter from the textbook ( Pointers! Pointers! You need to improve those petty little single digit horrible things!) Et cetera, et cetera. And somewhere down my lists, not even mentioned in words, there exists a very insignificant task. And I end up doing exactly that throughout the day. Why?

Why do I do this every single time?

Well, here’s why: I procrastinate. I prefer sharpening pencils rather than making notes with them. I prefer going out to buy mechanical pencils if sharpening the pencils are my top priority tasks. I would type an essay on why 0.5mm pencil lead sucks if writing with mechanical pencil is the most important task I need to do. And I will read a novel if I am asked to write an essay. And I will watch a movie if I am asked to read a novel. I will sleep if I am asked to watch a movie. But I would never ever do what needs to be done. If your life is going along the same track, then hi-five! Bud! We have got something in common. We are “procrastinanians”. We worship the goddess of procrastination.

But being the way we are is not easy. Remember those depression and self detesting attacks?

Why did I ever ever change my religion to procrastinism. This sucks! My life sucks! OMG! Get me cyanide, will you? Or wait, which is the tallest building in the city? God, I hate my life! I hate myself!

Sometimes these attacks are so severe that I really begin to wonder if I need some serious strong anti-depressant medicines. But the fact is – this depression is unnecessary. Yes, if I were a non-procrastinator perhaps my life would have been better. But twenty years of my life have made me realize that non-procrastinators are especially designed in a separate lab of heaven where most brilliant and geeky of gods and goddesses design the brain of human together. Not everybody gets to be product of that lab. It is reserved for special ones. And I am not the special one. I was genetically engineered to be a procrastinator in a much bigger and less exclusive lab.

But here’s another fact for all the depressed ones out there, this situation is not as incorrigible as you think. Procrastination is not that unproductive as you believe it to be. I am writing this article during my Power electronics lecture. And I don’t think I am doing something for which I should jump off a building. If I had not been a procrastinator I would have never done this. And this article would never have come into existence. Did I do something unproductive? No. I did something that was not important according to me. But I had to get this article done. And I am getting it done. God bless procrastination. I write for my blogs during my labs. I have completed many novels a day before exam. This is not un-productivity. This is running away (which is,well, not something to be proud of. But I don’t loathe myself for doing that). I do not mean to say it’s good. My point is- it’s not that bad. It would not fetch you pointers. It would not get you placed in Microsoft. I agree. But many times it makes you do things that you would have never done. In some cases it even makes you creative, or increase your general knowledge (I have spent infinite hours stumbling upon websites during exams). I do not think that it deserves to be the reason one should scold oneself to death. Procrastination doesn’t really mean sitting idle (being a “vegetable” is the appropriate term for that), it means doing less important things rather than the high priority tasks. That’s not good. But that’s not bad.

So, do try not to procrastinate much. It’s an old saying, and there is some sense and good advice in that. And if you have any success in doing that please let me know how you did it. (I beg you. I do need some help). But meanwhile, in case, you fail, do remember; life is still good. It’s cool. Light hai.